:: M.E. ::

ME stands for Manners & Etiquette. The beautiful Miss Meow is a professional etiquette instructor to hundreds of young female models. Now she's going to teach you how to impress the girls and to handle other difficult social situations.

This article is by Miss Meow - Click for all articles by this author.

You Never Get a Second Chance... By Miss Meow

Everyone has heard the old phrase, ‘You never get a second chance to make a first impression’. And as old fashioned as that sounds, it’s true!


Whether it’s making new friends at school or meeting your girlfriend’s parents, the rules remain the same. To put it simply: You should always be courteous and treat people how you would like to be treated. When you do that, it’s hard to go wrong.


Meeting someone for the first time can be hard. Oftentimes you don’t know if you’re going to like the person you’re meeting, or if he or she will like you. You may not know what to say. You may not know what they are thinking. The possibilities are endless and can be intimidating. But the best thing to do is believe in yourself, even though that can be tough to do when you are nervous.


One common mistake boys make is that they act too casual when they meet someone new. Guys often think if they “play it cool” they will come across as macho. But this new person doesn’t know you yet, and your version of playing it cool may come off as offensive. So cheesy pick up lines and cat calls are not the way to show your interest in a cute girl and slouchy posture and mumbled words are not going to score any points with her parents. Confidence can be both sexy and courteous.


Meeting a friend (or girlfriend)’s father or the dreaded big brother can also be intimidating but it doesn’t have to be. Make good eye contact, shake his hand, feel out the situation, and relax. Just be friendly. And if conflict arises, address it with a smile. Just do your best and if things don’t go as well as you liked, there’s always next time…because while you never get a second chance to make a first impression, there is definitely something to be said for perseverance. If at first you don’t succeed, wear them down with your dazzling personality.


Here are some helpful tips to assist you in being your best when meeting someone new.


What to do when meeting someone for the first time:


*Introduce yourself, don’t be shy!


*Speak clearly, confidently and loud enough to be heard.


*Maintain good eye contact.


*Smile. It’s ok to seem friendly.


*Shake hands. Yes, extend your hand and give a firm handshake. It’s old fashioned, but it allows you to take charge.


*Feel out the situation.


*Give him or her a compliment. Don’t stretch to find something nice to say, but if you like something, let them know. Just make sure it’s sincere. It will make you both feel good and might strike up conversation.


*Help break the ice between others. If you can think of something others have in common, bring it up. Helping others feel comfortable will help you — and make you more popular.


*Try to remember names, and USE them. It can personalize conversation, show someone you care, or just help you seem interested.


*Remember that it’s OK to not know what to say or to stutter and stammer now and then. Also, we all have our own way of speaking, our own accents, etc. That is nothing to be ashamed of.


*Listen attentively and use good body language.


*Most importantly, RELAX!!!




What not to do:
*Don’t ‘play it cool’.


*Avoid using slang and profanity. You don’t have to speak perfectly – you don’t want to sound fake, but keep in mind that others might be judging. Try to keep conversations appropriate. When in doubt, test the waters subtly.


*Don’t call people by nicknames unless you are sure they’re comfortable with it. For example: when you meet someone named Elizabeth, don’t call her Liz or Lizzie. It’s possible she may not like that name…or you by association.


*Don’t refer to people by nicknames when introducing them to others. Your friend Jason might go by the name Booger, but he might not want Elizabeth to know that right off the bat.


*Don’t downplay a compliment. Compliments are an ice breaker, so if someone says they like your shirt, don’t respond with a cliché, “What? This old thing?” If you do, you might not get another compliment any time soon. Downplaying it is insulting to the person giving the compliment. Smile and graciously say, “thanks!”


*Don’t trail off when speaking. It’s distracting. If people have to spend extra time trying to figure out what you’re saying they might stop listening.


*Don’t make things up. The truth is always easiest to remember. You don’t want to get caught in a lie. Don’t say you like something that you don’t. Don’t say you play football all the time when you’ve never thrown a pass. There are plenty of things you can do or things you like. You don’t have to do or like everything. If you say you do, you’ll seem like you’re trying too hard!


*Avoid confrontation. If your girlfriend’s dad seems grouchy, let him be. Don’t push it, and don’t grovel before him. Treat him with respect, and if he doesn’t return the favor, at least you know you tried.


*Avoid controversial subject matter. Sex, violence and politics are common subjects of conversation, but they are usually best discussed after you’ve known someone for a while.


*Don’t expect everyone to like you. Some people are hard to get along with. Others are quiet and don’t interact with others well. We all have our quirks, and remember not all personalities of people are compatible. But at least you can say you tried.